One of my biggest resolutions this year was to quit smoking. I knew it wouldn’t be easy and expected a struggle. Oddly enough, I haven’t really had much of a struggle at all. I picked up a box of nicotine patches to help and have drank a ton of iced water to help with the cravings and need to have something to my lips. Everything has gone pretty smoothly. I haven’t had a cigarette since 11:30 PM on December 31. (And trust me, there have been instances like my mothers visit yesterday to really make me want one!)
The nicotine patch can help big time with the cravings. Of course, it is still delivering nicotine to your body and you slowly ween yourself down MG until you no longer need them. No problem. I can do that. I was all happy and in love with the patches for helping me quit. But, they have decided they hate me! How do I know? Well because of al the evil they have been creating! For starters, they itch. And I mean ITCH! The itch goes away after a bit so it’s not completely intolerable. But once the itch is gone, the pain sets in. I still don’t know how, but I think these little nicotine monsters are getting under my skin and beating my bones with baseball bats!
I get pains randomly down my entire arm like something has struck a nerve! Its always on the arm the patch is on, so I know its the patch. It really does hate me! I normally put it on first thing in the morning and take it off before bed. I’ve read the side effects and they say they can cause bad dreams. I have bad dreams a lot, not intolerable… but just to be cautious and enjoy my sleep I make sure to take it off. Until last night. I had a long day and I was just exhausted. So, I fell asleep and forgot the demons were still attached to my arm! Apparently, when my body is not as active, they manage to go further then beating my arm bones with a bat! They travel all the way up to my head and create very vivid, very horrible bad dreams!
When I say bad dreams, I don’t mean the “Oh man, I had a bad dream last night. That sucked.” kind of bad dreams. I mean the straight out of the worst horror story you could ever imagine, wake up crying and heart racing wishing you had awoke the first minute or two of the dream instead of having to see the things you saw, kind of dream! I know I lost a good 2 pounds just sleeping through that dream! I have never in my life! I typically forget most of my dreams, but for some reason, I can remember every little part of it!
The nicotine monsters were in full force and screaming at me to take off the patch and just smoke them instead. They hate me for quitting. They want to make my life a living hell! But you know what? I one upped them this time! I took that patch off and threw the demons in the trash! I refuse to put another on. It has left a scar on my memory for the rest of my life. I do not need them and I will conquer this on my own without them evil monsters! I can do this and I will!